“Just shut up and leave me alone. You have no idea what it’s like to live a tough life.”
A smile passed over my lips and I began to roll up my sleeves exposing the colorful artwork that was usually obscured by my dress shirt. I did know exactly what it was like to live in a cycle of addiction and crime; I knew the agony of living a life of selfishness; I had felt the bitter pain of longing with all my heart to love, but being incapable of doing so. As Jared stared at the tattoos that covered my arms I could sense his heart was softening, he realized I wasn’t the enemy, that unlike most counselors, I truly understood his dilemma, not because of my course of studies, but because of the visible scars left by the wounds of living without hope for so long.
He was a father to an adorable 2 year old girl he had never met. Now in one week this 17 year old “man” was about to meet his daughter for the first time. He was terrified. He had no idea what being a man meant, let alone being a father. But as we sat there and I shared my life with him, tears started to roll down his cheeks faster and faster. The truth of manhood that I shared with him was resonating deep in his teenage heart because he longed to be a man. At the end of the session he asked if he could hug me. And he did, and I believe it was the first time he ever cried tears of joy. I assured him of my prayers and help and gave him my phone number.
A few months later, the phone rang early; I recognized Jared’s number and picked up. He had gone back to drugs and drinking again. He was broken and needed help. I immediately drove out to Bay Shore to pick him up. Listening intently to his story God spoke to me and told me he needed a family, not another rehab. I stopped him and asked him if he would like to live with my family, not as a tenant, but as a son to my wife and I and a brother to my kids. He broke down and wept. “Sir,” he said, “I have never been loved like this before.” “Get used to it” I said. He smiled and fell asleep.
He stayed with us and became a part of our family. My kids loved him and he loved them. I witnessed a profound change in him. For the first time in his life, he was part of a family. We trusted him completely and he did not disappoint. He worked hard to contribute and earned my respect, as I in turn earned his as well. It was a learning experience for both of us. I loved him like a son and am proud to say I learned so much about life from him.
After some time, he moved on. He took responsibility for his daughter and his girlfriend. He moved back in with his father, who he had run away from so long ago. He has held a steady job now for three months and is sober for six. He got a G.E.D, started college and works full time as a locksmith. I am so proud of Jared and how he has turned his life around. I spoke with him often about God, and he was enthralled by the mystery, the love of God. I always reminded him that “You seek the heights of manhood when you seek the depths of God.” For the sake of his daughter, Jared sought the depths of God and because of the Life Center of Long Island, this little girl has a father who lives every moment of his life for her.
~Anthony Gentile